Ask Jane!

Who is Jane?

"Jane" is The Dragon's resident expert in all things middle school. The following requests for advice were produced by actual MMS students, but their names have been changed to protect the innocent. If you issue to submit a problem or question to Jane, feel free to get an "Ask Jane" form from your English teacher or print off the attached form, fill it out, and drop it in Mr. Sorensen's or Ms. Warren's mailbox.

Ask Jane Column for Issue #1, October 30th, 2006

Dear Jane,

I have a girlfriend in 9 th grade, so I don't see her very often and I've kind of lost interest in her. The problem is that I have other friends that say that if I break up with her, she'd be sad and angry with me and she'd never talk to me again. I want to be friends with her but nothing special. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Relationship Stressed

Dear Relationship Stressed,

Your problem is actually really common. If you really don't like her anymore as anything other than a friend, you should break up with her. She'll probably be more hurt if you continue going out with her and you don't like her. A lot of times, people are hurt when they get dumped, but most likely, she'll get over it. It may take a little bit to really get to be friends again, it may never happen, but I'm sure that you'll both be ok. If you were friends before you started going out, then I think your friendship will be able to survive, otherwise, you may just have to try harder to be friends than you normally would, if that's really what you want.

Sincerely,
Jane

 

Dear Jane,

This girl three lockers away from me always accuses me of bullying, but I don't mean to, and she is denting my rep. Help!

Locker Loser

Dear Locker Loser,

What are you doing for her to call you a bully? Are you taking her stuff or locking her locker on her? Did you really do any of the things she is accusing you of? If you haven't, talk to her. Maybe she is just stressed out and nothing seems to be going her way. Help her out when she needs it and don't forget to give her some space too. If worst comes to worst, you can always seek out a guidance counselor to get this whole thing sorted out.

Jane

 

Dear Jane,

There's this girl who keeps stealing my book in homeroom. Can you help me?

Just Want to Read

Dear Just Want to Read,

This must be frustrating. First let's think, have you done anything in order to make her take your book, for example take hers? If you have, you just have a regular game of “cat and mouse" on your hands, and I think you can handle it as long as you don't interrupt others' reading in the process. But if she is just doing it for fun, try moving away from her or even talking to her. She probably just thinks it is funny and wants to get a laugh, so just be strong and don't let it bother you.

Jane

 

 

Dear Jane,

I NEED HELP! I have a severe case of verbal diarrhea. I talk too much and can't control what I say. What should I do?

Signed,
In Need of Duct Tape

Dear In Need of Duct Tape,

I am SO excited to answer your question! Partly because it's fun, but mostly because I have almost the same problem! Talking a lot is not completely a bad thing because we all do it at one point or another, but not having control over what you say is a problem. If you find that hurtful and back-stabbing things seem to keep popping out of your mouth, you really need to think about what you say before it actually comes out. I know that sounds completely cliché-ish but I really mean it. If you can't stop, think, and put yourself in the other person's shoes, or you will soon find yourself without friends. A wise person once told me, "Don't say the first thing that comes to your mind, don't even say the second, listen to the third thing that comes to mind, make sure it won't hurt the person's feelings, and then go with that one."

Sincerely,
Jane

 

RANDOM RESPONSE OF THE WEEK:

Dear Jane,

I had three dogs that ran away last year. Their names were/are Al, Berta, and Saskatchewan . I really miss them and want them to come back. The problem is that I think my uncle, who thinks he is the boogeyman, is holding them hostage. What should I do?

Signed,
Scared of the Boogeyman

Dear Scared of the Boogeyman,

Wow, I'm not even going to touch your name choice for those dogs. I know some people who would most definitely consider that a slur against Canadians. I have to admit, I'm not really a dog person, I don't own one, never have, and most likely never will, but I understand you missing them. If you honestly believe that your uncle is holding them hostage, you should talk to him about it. Maybe he doesn't even know they are your dogs. If he truly thinks he is the boogeyman, well, let him have his fun, but tell him you want your dogs back.

Sincerely,
Jane